Feeling Isolated? Marriage and Isolation is a danger that may threaten every marriage at some point. A husband and wife slowly drift apart in ways they don’t even recognize at first. Signs of isolation include the following:
* A feeling that your spouse isn’t hearing you and doesn’t want to understand
* An attitude of “Who cares?” Giving up
* A feeling of being unable to meet the expectations of your spouse
* A sense that your spouse is detached from you
* A refusal to cope with what’s wrong: “That’s your problem, not mine.”
* Feeling that keeping the peace by avoiding the conflict is better than the pain of dealing with reality
If you notice these characteristics in your marriage, you have begun experiencing the danger of isolation.Every relationship needs a plan to defeat isolation and to bring about intimacy. Isolation is like a cancer that invades your marriage, silently, slowly, and painlessly at first. By the time many couples become aware of its insidious effects, it may be in place. Your marriage can eventually be paralyzed by boredom and apathy, and it could even die from emotional malnutrition and neglect.
DO NOT ALLOW ISOLATION TO HAPPEN TO YOU
1) We were created for relationship, that is how we thrive. Whatever is going on within you, even if you are unsure what it is-require yourself to always bring it into relationship by sharing it in a nurturing and respectful fashion.
2) Deliberately deny the natural selfishness we have, and accept what your partner shares even if you do not understand it or agree with it. Yes, you can affirm how they feel even if it is different from you.
3) Agree together you will always try to make the problem the problem. Do not allow yourselves to see each other as the problem. The different opinion, or the hurt feelings, or the words used, etc. is the problem-not each other.
4) View your marriage as a living thing-IT IS. Consider an analogy that speaks to you-nurturing an infant, raising a puppy, cultivating a vegetable garden. Point is, something that is alive must be cared for every day or it suffers. Depending on circumstances, the care required to keep something alive changes accordingly. Marriage and Isolation should not go together.
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